CNN’s Kike-A-Like, Wolf Blitzer, yesterday asked two “important” questions: Who is Jihadi John, and why isn’t he dead?

Verbal vernacular: Unpast – a new verb tense, to undo something [i.e. un-to-die (undie), un-to-be (wis)]

First of all, Wolf, it’s not “Jihadi John” It’s “Jihad ‘Lefty’ Joe.” Second, could Jihad “Lefty” Joe be the black-shirted, Steve Jobs?

YES, and you know why Jihad “Lefty” Joe isn’t dead? Wolf, baby, you can’t kill something that’s already dead! Steve Jobs isn’t; he wis! He wis now in Iraq doing God’s (Alla’s) work! CHOP, CHOP!!! Soon, he and his undead army will take back Jerusalem and rename it to Islamselam! Then, it will be on to Tel Aviv!

The Black Shirt is the standard uniform of CEOs in the Silicon Valley, and also of CSOs in the Middle East. What’s a CSO? That’s Chief Slitting Officer! During rounds of layoffs in the Silicon Valley, there’s a reason that CEOs wear The Black Shirt, and if you didn’t know, now you do! Silicon Valley CEOs love The Black Shirt!

The news it out! Jihad “Lefty” Joe lopped off yet-another-head!

Apparently, westerners and their supporters still have not seen the memo: STAY OUT OF THE MIDDLE EAST. YOU ARE NOT WELCOME HERE BECAUSE OF THE AWFUL THINGS YOU’VE DONE TO US. Of course, Americans and Japanese will be “up in arms” about the latest beheading, losing sight of just what has led to ISIS.

ISIS did not drone people’s weddings. ISIS did not machine gun innocents meeting on a street. America did that with the support of its “coalition” of the willing, and I won’t repeat what Israel, America’s fifty-first state, has been up to in Gaza and along the west bank of the Jordan. America and Israel are the irritants that led to the disease of ISIS, and the more irritation, the more ISIS!

I would feel sorry for Kenji Goto, except that he and his idiot friend were begging – BEGGING – for a beheading. Guess what? They got what they asked for! After all, Jihad “Lefty” Joe knows how to use that knife of his.

These self proclaimed “freelance” reporters, traveling to Iraq and Syria, are nothing but novice tourists. News agencies across the world take advantage of their naivete the way child pornographers take advantage of children.

Kenji’s last name reminds me of an old BASIC command that computer programmers haven’t used in twenty years, or more. The command is “goto,” pronounced “go-too.” I haven’t used the relic in more than thirty years, but let me see if I still remember how:

10 if stupid$ = true then goto 40
20 print "Dodged that bullet!"
30 goto 50
40 print "Time to die! CHOP! CHOP!!!"
50 end
60 rem Click
here to view Kenji in his last starring role in "Islamic State Metes Out Justice!"